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Yes, that title could be a ‘trigger’ for some. I’m not sitting here writing that title in a bullying manner.

In actual fact, like many of my articles it’s kind of aimed at myself as a reminder.

A reminder of how powerful I am. That I have choices, that deep down I will always have a solution and that I shouldn’t ‘give up’ or declare to myself that I’m not capable.

So why should you care about not being a victim?

Well for starters, WHENEVER you fall into being a victim you give away your power. You might think that you don’t have power, but that’s not true.

You’ve managed to get to where you are today because of your decisions and your power to make things happen – whatever that might be.

It could be getting the job you’re now in – whether you actually like it or not.
It could be the relationship you are in (or not in) – whether you like it or not.
It could be whatever happened yesterday in your life – whether you liked it or not.

However, you might consider that these things just happen, but I can guarantee you had a hand in them happening – by either your actions or your inaction.

I know I sound like a bully if I told you to stop being a victim and blaming other people for your circumstances.

But actually, I want to also point out that being a bully is just as pointless in moving towards your goals and dreams as being a victim is.

These two roles are part of the triangle of roles people can often fall into. The third being a rescuer – where you believe it’s your duty to always help people out of their situations or problems.

Any one of these roles is not you being powerful. These three roles can prevent you from actually taking control of your life and designing it the way you want, and interestingly, they all interact with each other really well.

Bullies attack victims and victims get rescued – the energy in these roles all feed off each other. But what other role should you take?

Be a leader. In your life, be your own leader.

Take back control, realise that you decide and make the choices for yourself and you make it ALL happen for yourself.

I’m not saying this from a position of – well I’ve made everything happen that I want.

Hell no, I’ve struggled, been challenged and sometimes not made real my dreams.

But I do push. Somedays harder than others, but I push towards my dreams.

I put in place step by step actions that get me closer to what I want. I have no idea how long a dream or goal will take me but as long as I am working towards it, and making sure that everything I do is aligned to my dreams, then I believe I can’t go wrong.

I’m willing to adapt and change according to how my goals progress. I’m also willing to accept that sometimes I am wrong and even sometimes I will fail.

It’s hard. I feel bad or guilty if that happens sometimes, but I pick myself up and get on with it.

Change the goal, change what I’m doing, change whatever is necessary to allow my ‘stream’ to follow the natural path that opens up to me as I take action.

Being a leader is not ALWAYS about forging out in front of other to show the way.

It is as simple as being yourself, allowing yourself to FEEL, and keep moving – in whatever direction that might present itself that FEELS good.

Not allowing yourself to fall ‘victim’, not always being the one to pick up the pieces (because that doesn’t empower others), and it’s not about turning misfortune on to others through blame and shame.

Reclaim your power, because IT IS IN YOU. And when you do, nothing will stop you.

Thoughts? Post them in the comments below x

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