Last week I wrote about financial balance. I like discussing balance because there are many articles online that state that finding balance is a myth or pretty much impossible to attain. But I think it entirely depends on your perspective on it.
Why do I like discussing balance? Because it’s something that we all deal with and I personally feel like I am always striving to do ALL the things I want to do, but without sacrificing anything in the process.
Let me tell you my situation.
I’m a mother and it turns out that my role has fallen as the primary carer for my kids whilst my husband has been the more ‘traditional’ role. I never knew how much of my soul would be given over to my children – a lot at first but as they grow and become more independent, I find I am able to reclaim bits of my soul as evolution takes place.
I have sooooo many things I still want to do with my life. I’ve had quite an eventful life so far – by no means have I been someone who hasn’t seen the world….
I’ve followed my passion and dedicated 12 years of my life to acting. In the process I was able to tour, meet amazing people, have incredible experiences and do things the way I wanted to, without holding back.
I’ve also travelled round the world back packing, seeing incredible places, experiences new cultures and just opening my eyes to different ways of living a life.
I’ve lived in many different places and the whole time been able to follow my heart doing whatever I was called to do. Yes, sometimes I have been constrained by finances but I have ALWAYS figured things out to do whatever I wanted.
Now, as I have transitioned to another season in my life (giving myself over to motherhood and sharing my life with someone I love deeply) I still find there are things I want to do. However, I am aware that I don’t have the ‘freedom’ I used to have.
And this is where I have become very aware of balance in my life. Before having children and finding the love I have, I was very independent and was more tipped at the end of the scale of freedom and independence, but there was no balance in having a sense of belonging. I sacrificed that (I’ll go into more detail next week) in order to follow my dreams.
Now I feel I am at the other end of that scale. I have the deep sense of belonging yet I am constrained with what I can do because of my responsibilities. And let me say that I am not complaining about those responsibilities – I made the choices I made and I don’t regret them – yet I still strive for this balance.
I only have a certain number of hours to dedicate to my business each week. Yes, I could make the decision to hustle my ass off and work all hours of the day to achieve what I want in a shorter space of time, but with that I would have to sacrifice time with my children and time with my husband. And I don’t want to do that. So for me, the balance is measuring and perfecting the levers in my life to create the balance in any given moment.
I decide when to put the foot on the gas in my business and work into the wee small hours of the morning, and then there are times that I decide to slow down and allow myself to BE with the people I love – even if that IS sitting watching back to back episodes of Billions with my husband.
Sometimes I feel like it’s a juggling act where I feel at the mercy of my circumstances, and sometimes I KNOW that it’s all my choice in how I live my life. (This is something I dive into in my ‘How to Get Unstuck’ free email course – which you can join by clicking here).
So what is the take away from today’s article?
It’s that we all have choices. We have to take responsibility for where we are today and what we want to do.
Don’t feel that balance is unattainable – it’s not a static thing, it’s a constant shifting of weight into different areas of life that sometimes results in huge movements either side of the scale, or sometimes the scale imperceptibly shifts this way or that depending on what is going on in your life.
It can feel like a juggling act, but I try to look at it as the interesting journey we are all on and that whatever choices we do make must FEEL good. That’s where it all lies.
If something is not feeling good, do something different. It might not mean completely changing direction, it might just be a small tweak to adjust the rudder on your boat to send you off towards a new destination.
That’s all for this week folks. Let me know your thoughts in the comments below.